Discovering Discovery Trail

Did my 3km+ walk last night and explored the Discovery Trail on the other side of the beach and boardwalk. What a different feeling of space as soon as you enter the woodland. The air settled down around me like a muted bell made of gauze, the texture nearly palpable. Humidity hung still with only an occasional liftlet, surprising me with smells that I never thought possible in the middle of the city. I took more deep breaths than I normally would in weeks.

If, like astrogrrl advised, that I release something with every deep breath, lightness of being will soon be a way of life for me ☺

The sculpted path meanders along the waters of the marina, on this Sunday evening it was completely at rest except for clusters of water fowls bobbing and dipping in serious leisure. I suppose I am in serious leisure too, along with the guy sitting on the dock staring with serious absorption at the water. Here and there were trees in various stages of death and dying. I felt sad about them only because I could not see in that moment what will come in their place, though I want faith in Providence and Source that we will all be cared for, to our deepest needs.

As I write this last sentence I felt the familiar congestive pain in the right side of my chest, radiating towards my arm. I asked my body for help. Is this a pathological illness on the physical level? No. Is it strictly psychosomatic? Yes. (But it feels so physical! Ouch!) I took a couple of deep breaths. Hmmm. It is because I was trying to control, trying to control how I wanted my words to appear in that sentence. It is a symptom that appears when I vie for control of a situation (such as traffic), a thought (such as a belief), a feeling (such as fear); when I try to override with my will without discerning what is wisdom; when I resist what ought to be; when I don’t listen to my body, my higher knowing. I apologize for my negligence and carelessness, and resolve to surrender myself with more conviction.

Surrender is the only ritual I need. Thank you, Source and my body, for this reminder.