My Practice: Work-In-Progress

Woke up shortly after 7am today (a strange, rare and peculiar event), and began my yoga/meditation without getting out of bed (I did make the bed first though.) The curling-under-a-wave sensation was there again, and the calm-of-the-void feeling with it. It was still very brief but I could feel the beginning of it settling downward into me. Then my mind was on the loose again…

Breathing as deeply as I can so it reaches past my diaphragm (unbelievable that I have to ‘tell’ myself to do that) to fill my pelvis as well, a thought emerges:

We don’t create.
We don’t even co-create.

We capture.

Everything has been created already, long ago.
We are only experiencing and re-experiencing Creation.
As vessels and channels of these experiences,
we are as unique as each pot is unique,
And how we capture is different from one person
to another, one time from another.
But what comes through us, the torrent of energy we call
Creativity, has been there all along. Long before

we were created. Like a spring
deeply sourced in the mountains, dreams never run dry.
Whether we attend to a dream or not, it’ll come around again
and again until its message is received, or our life changes
and it is no longer needed.

Always resourceful.
Always recyclable.
Always sustainable.
Always bountiful.
Nature’s is the only way
we can afford.

Cataloging Change

Meditation this morning was not to be, my mind is a wild wind.

I thought about the family dinner last night at my sister’s, with those whose blood is closest to my own. The halo of beauty, simplicity, and a precious harmony that seems always to surround these family gatherings the last few years. What an enormous change that has been from what used to be. I thought about discipline, how I’m seriously accepting its significance in my life for the first time. I thought about how much I want to lose this uncomfortable weight I’ve been carrying. (How much, exactly, do I want this??) I thought about writing some poems today, maybe haikus…

This year is going to require a lot of trust on my part, in Life, in myself.

Speaking of enormous change, I thought i would take a quick inventory of just how much has changed in myself in the last year:

• Yoga and meditation – woulda never put money on doing them with any degree of joy, nevermind as routine and, dare I say it, commitment??

• Zen Buddhism and Daoism – little or no concept of what they were a year ago, certainly no feel for them.

• Doing household chores and other onerous tasks with serenity and even enjoyment – you’ve gotta be kidding!

• Riding the same wave of expansion, cooking and trying out new recipés have also become a new interest. I’m beginning to have a feel for basic spices and flavours of herbs and condiments that used to be a blind spot for me.

• Looking forward to and enjoying family gatherings – and allowing my heart to be opened by love – never before seen nor felt.

• Relating to trees, lake, birds, plants, stones, my neighbourhood, even people – nowadays with a smile in my body.

• Opened to group energy with less resistance, allowing the beauty of each person to come through.